Incorrect Perceptions

              Behind the Shiny Glass

We’re so quick to sit back and get jealous over Entertainers, Performers, Celebrities, and those of the likeness. Do we ever stop to think what could really be going on? Just because they’re on tv looking exceptionally sexy and handsome, appearing on numerous tv shows, going to the flyist destination spots we would just love to go to, doesn’t mean life is easy for them. Remember they’re working for money just like we do every day. The only difference is we see them “publicly” everywhere. That is the sacrifice they make. We need to understand unless we can individually make the same sacrifices of working hour to hour- nonstop on certain days, making numerous appearances, eat nor sleep hours in between, and be separated from your family and friends traveling from state to state or country to country and still keep a “professional” and happy smile on your face then see how well you will do. I think it was interpreted best at Whitney Houston’s funeral when her brother stated,    

I don’t know what it’s like so I’m trying to view underneath the cover or veil. We need to be more sensitive and compassionate. They are not robots or auto-bots. They’re real living people like you and me. We don’t know if they go to these exclusive resorts and hot islands just to work. They may not have a chance to enjoy the surroundings or activities to the fullest because their assignment may be to involve the location. The most fun they probably get out of it is getting done-up, incorporating the destination in their work, or filming a music video in the spot. Yes, we hear about the clubs and parties in abundance. So they’re getting out and having fun that way. Guests of the night. Amenities in over-flow. So that’s living the good life! But what we also know is that these parties and gatherings they’re also networking and forming bonds with others who work in the same industry. Everyone comes out at night and want to party. So why not have a location set-up like a party that will attract any and everybody. There you have it! Everyone under one roof. 

We’ve heard famous stars admit they do not like to party and stay out all night. It is not the life for everyone especially when you’ve done it so much you’ve worn yourself out. The responsibilities of having children and a family is another reason. So they are human too, just like us. Hollywood equals big money, which means working round the clock. There’s no way anyone could live their “high-life” working a minimum wage job or any of these well-paying jobs out here. You can live well in nice neighborhoods but to live luxuriously on a daily basis you must work big to make big money. Big bosses and big businesses are the closest associations on the spectrum.

I’m not declaring or advocating in being THE Spokesperson for the Rich and the Famous. I don’t live their lives or know what goes on but we need to stop and think first before assuming what we “see” truly is the real thing. We wouldn’t want others to perceive our lives with false pretense. Think about when you watch performers on tv doing tricks and dancing. It looks easy as pie but that’s what hard work looks like. Effortless. Think about the amount of time, practice, and dedication it took just to make it look that way. Perfect. I believe in the saying, everything is not always as it seems. More than likely what you’re viewing is for “face value”. What happens behind the scenes of many situations is not as pretty as what you’re seeing right then and there. In life we don’t want others to see how ugly and disturbed our personal lives are. We try to cover it up and tie it with a bow on the surface. As people we are ashamed if our lives are not as pieced together as we would like it to be.

I can go further as to discuss how in everyday life the same applies. Judgments are passed each and every day. In my opinion it comes from insecurity, fear, and jealousy. For instance I don’t have to know anyone, which is typical of going out into the world, and if there’s something about another young woman that I want, lack, or just have a problem with for no reason then I know I’m passing judgment. Sometimes it’s subconscious, other times on the surface, and also quite frankly, just me having a rotten day or in a bad mood. If we’re able to recognize why we judge each other so harshly we can regroup our mindset and treat each other better. It could just be a human thing or the way society has been taught to view each other. We do live in a country where we still can’t find the common balance in our differences racially and culturally. It may play a very significant role as to how we get jealous and intolerable of each other’s personalities and corky ways.

I notice how we can’t deal with each other just by watching my favorite shows every day and when I interact with people in my life. One of the things that irritate me the most is when someone is talking and another person is literally talking over them. Let me explain further. If you ask someone a question and expect them to answer why would you wait until they start talking to already be asking another question??? I don’t know what’s going on with this society but if that isn’t rude I don’t know what the h*ll is. As you can tell with my usage of profanity, it really heats my blood up. Whatever happened to listening??? I recall conversations of my past and through the people I’ve known there were overly long-winded encounters to the point where I did multiple tasks with the phone on speaker or just flat out fall asleep! I can understand how a thought springs to mind and you want to share it before the conversation turns left, but there is a difference between over-talking and forgetting there’s another person on the other line, and just being chatty. It can come across as being self-absorbed and rude. I like a good conversation. Especially if the topic is something very interesting that can lead into other topics of discussion, much like sub-categories of chatter. I love questions that allow you to give a personalized deeply-rooted answer that is significant to the person as well as someone else. Questions that can be asked the same exact way but everyone will give their own unique answer based on their walks of life. That excites me!

Okay another way I experience judgment. I could be out anywhere needing service of some kind and I’ll either encounter a warm personality or a rotten one. Usually I’m encountering other females, sad to say in these environments. You’re not exempt though fellas! I’ve encountered some pms males out here too. I don’t know about you but I can meet someone and can tell almost instantly if they’re going to be ugly towards me. Pay attention to the face. The face tells so much. I usually see a transition. Also pay attention to what you feel inside. If you don’t have the same feeling you felt before you shook the person’s hand or placed your order, then more than likely you’re feelings are correct.  I won’t bypass the fact that there are days when we’re not in the best mood. We don’t want to deal with anyone, let alone get out of the bed, but we must depending on our daily priorities [running errands and working ]. But what I’m mainly talking about is when you’re out by yourself, one other person, or a group and you see the interaction from a serviceman or servicewoman change from one person to you. Then it becomes personal. Then you sit back and wait to see if they do little subtle things to show they’re trying to create a blood bath with you. It’s a shame to go out into the world and deal with these things but it is a part of life. When you’ve had enough of being stepped on you’ll start piping up and letting your voice be heard. I am typically a shy person by nature until you get to know me. Then you must sound the alarms. As I get older I see how important it is to speak up. It shows you will not take crap off of anyone, you’re aware of what wrongfully has been done to you, and you demand respect as a person.

I’ve learned to appreciate others’ differences even when it’s annoying. We’re all different for a reason. No one is supposed to be like the next person, society just pushes it to the limit. If we appreciate others for their differences then it will be easier for us to appreciate our own selves. It’s also easier to accept others for who they are if you’ve experienced a setback in your life. I grew up in an environment where I wasn’t treated the best. I was already shy so it made matters worse. As a kid I was bullied and ostracized in my peer group and it made my growing up years difficult to handle. I couldn’t wait to get out of school altogether only to find In the Adult world the same mistreatment exists! It cannot be escaped so the only way to survive is to stand up to it face to face with your vulnerabilities outward and the confidence to show, I AM good being me and I don’t care what you think. That’s how I’ve come to grips with it. Go through something time and time again and watch your patience run out. You will get so fed up and irritable that the true survivor in you will come out. Aint takin’ no shit kinda person! In this life we meet sweet people and we meet mean people. Sometimes we meet people with masks and we see 1 person one second and another the next. It’s all a big puzzle. But as long as we appreciate ourselves we can judge each other less and find the great things that each one of us possesses.